IF THEY CANNOT CONTAIN - 1 Corinthians 7:9
1 Corinthians 7:9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
In this passage, Paul is talking about one of the benefits of those who accept the calling of God to live a celibate life, dedicated fully to God. Paul was a single man who was able to go out and do great things for God because he did not have to worry about taking care of a spouse and a family. However, Paul acknowledges that not everyone is called to be celibate; in fact, in verse seven he acknowledges that it is a gift from God for an individual to remain single.
In Matthew 19:11-12, Jesus makes clear that the calling for an individual to live a single life is a special calling from God. If God has not placed a special calling upon your life to live a life fully dedicated to God, then your focus should be upon the general command of God to marry and be fruitful and multiply.
In this passage, Paul is addressing those individuals who believe that they have been called to a life of fully dedicating themselves to God without the obligations and responsibilities of a spouse. In verse 32 and 33 Paul reveals that the unmarried are able to concern themselves with how they please God while the married have an additional obligation of pleasing their spouse.
In verse 20 and 24, Paul again addresses the calling and admonishes one to remain faithful to the calling of God. Thus if God has given you a special calling to remain single, that should be your focus. When Paul wrote this passage, there was great persecution going on in the Church and as such, it was advisable to not marry at that time because it might cause some to deny God and renounce their Christianity because they were more concerned about taking care of their spouse.
If you read the entire chapter in context, this verse applies to those individuals who believe they have received the calling not to marry and to thus dedicate their lives to serving God. Apparently, there were individuals who chose to remain single not because they were called and received the gift, but because they were around individuals who had been called to live a life dedicated fully to God. Much in the same way that Ananias and Sapphira sold a piece of property in order to keep up with the Jones, so some people claimed to have a gift of celibacy.
Those individuals who were claiming to have the gift of celibacy but really were not called were apparently facing great temptation by Satan. Satan knows whether or not you have the calling and gift and thus knows how to tempt you. Rather than yield to temptation, Paul tells us that it is better to marry and fulfill the commands of God then to commit sexual immorality trying to live to a higher standard than God has called you to.
The word contain in this verse is the same Greek word translated as temperance. This means that if you do not have the self-control to remain single, then do not put yourself in a position where you might fail and cause even more damage to the name of Christ. Throughout the world, there are Priests that have taken a vow of celibacy who have done great damage to themselves and to the Catholic church because they could not control their sexual desires.
If you are called to be celibate, then God will give you the grace to fulfill your calling. However, if you are not called, do not put yourself in a position where you will fail. If you know that you have a weakness that could cause you to sin and face the wrath of God, then do not insist that you have a special calling and destroy both your life and your soul. Do not attempt to live beyond the calling that God has given you because you may be setting yourself up for failure.